,,…created in man His own image and likeness,…subdue the earth, have dominion over it” – Gen. 1:27-28

As Man, you were created to walk in dominion! To fulfill your God given mandate to rule and reign in life, becoming a King and expanding the Kingdom of God where ever you have jurisdiction!

But – how do you get there? How do you start to walk in dominion in your life?

You can’t rule and reign while you’re still being ruled over by your past! Walking in dominion starts by becoming proactive about your past, taking responsibility for it and executing God’s Kingdom agenda into it.

The prison of unforgiveness
Not forgiving the hurts and offenses of your past is like being bound by chains that hold you back from moving into what God has for you. Unforgiveness binds you and puts chains around you where past hurts, offenses and wounds rule over you. A Man in chains is not a King – he’s a captive and a slave!

A hurt that is done to you creates a wound in your heart and a loss of life. Unforgiveness is saying ”I can’t move on in life until you have paid me back and made up for the loss you caused.” In the same time, the lies and ungodly beliefs that have been created in your heart through these experiences continue to rule over your behavior and perception of truth.

Cut the chains and enter the throne God has for you
Forgiveness is the weapon that cuts those chains! When you forgive, you release the one who caused the hurt from having to pay the dept, and you receive the life that Jesus shed on the cross in His blood as payment for it. You’re saying ”You don’t owe me anymore, Jesus has paid it all for you – and more. I have received more from Jesus than I ever lost!”

In that moment, the chains fall off. You are free to move on in life and to start walking in dominion. To forgive means you exercise authority and dominion over the wounds and hurts of you past, where they no longer run your life. It allows God to start raising you into a Jesus like King!

Eph. 5:1 tells you to be an imitator of God, that means you act like God acts. What an amazing potential you have as a Man!! But – the verse begins with ”therefore”.
That connects it back to Eph. 4:32 which says ”forgive one another, even as Christ has forgiven you.”

The first thing that makes you into a Jesus-like imitator of God is to forgive those who hurt you!

Look at God – He forgave mankind for betraying Him, destroying the world and handing it over to satan, and even killing His son!
Forgiving mankind empowered God to move on with His plan of salvation, and to re-gain rulership over the earth.

How do you forgive?
Below, I give you the exact same steps that God has lead me through when I forgave the two persons that hurt me the most! Following God through these steps has totally transformed my life!

1. Decide in your heart that you want to forgive.
Forgiveness is a decision, not a feeling. Even if you aren’t in the place in your heart yet to forgive, decide that you want to, and ask God to lead you through the process.

2. Pray daily for that person – Lk. 6,27-28
This is a powerful way to soften your heart, and to start tapping in to God’s compassion for the one who hurt you. It will move your heart!

3. Thank and praise God for the good in the one you want to forgive.
Look for the good God has placed in the one who hurt you. What strength and gift? What do you appreciate with that person? Praise God for that.

4. Ask God if there is anything you need to ask the other one for forgiveness for.
Is there anything hurtful you have done to the other one? Even if it was just your reaction to the hurt? Admit and acknowledge it.

5. Meet that person, and forgive.
This is the most freeing and powerful step of all! If possible, meet the person face to face, and:
a) tell them what you appreciate with them & are thankful for
b) admit your faults, ask for forgiveness where you need to ask for it
c) tell you forgive everything

If you can’t meet that person, try to get a video- or phone call with them. If that’s not possible or they are dead, write a letter!

In some cases, you might not have done anything hurtful or wrong. Don’t try to come up with something if Holy Spirit doesn’t show you anything. In other cases it might be not the best idea to meet a person face to face, like in situations of physical abuse or severe trauma. In those cases, I highly recommend to work through the forgiveness process with a ministry like ”Restoring the Foundation” who can help you with it.

Prov. 29:11 says that ”it is a man’s glory to overlook a transgression”. In other words, it is a man’s honor to forgive! It paints the picture of a man killing the lion that has hold him captive all his life, and then receiving the honor of a ”lion killer”.

Look at how Jesus honored Steven in Acts 7,54-60 when he forgave those who were killing him: He rose from His throne and gave him standing ovations! When you forgive – you are killing the lions in your life, and Jesus respects you big time for that!





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A seed needs the right environment so it can grow. But what is the right environment for a seed to grow?

After your new birth, you as a man are like a tree that is growing through different stages on it’s way to become the tree it already is. In the last blog we mentioned 3 things that can help you on the journey of manhood. Today we are going to look at the right environment for growth – because every great tree is growing in an environment that support it’s growth.

Psalms 92,12-15 talks about the righteous being like a mighty tree that is planted and grows in the courts of the Lord. The righteous starts out as a seed being planted in the ground, which is you after your new birth. There it then finds everything it needs to sprout forth and become that mighty tree.
In other words, the growth of the righteous happens in a growth environment.

A seed needs the right environment to grow
Every seed is planted into the ground, and it is the ground which provides different factors that make the growth of that seed into a great tree possible. These factors are:

A) Nutrition
The ground provides the nourishment necessary for growth.

B) Protection
The ground protects from the elements above ground.

C) Positive Pressure
The ground offers resistance to the seed which it must grow through. That makes the sprout strong enough to withstand the elements once it breaks ground.

Besides that, having enough light and water are two other environmental factors that are crucial for the seeds successful growth and development.

Create a growth environment in your life
Like the seed, you need the right environment to support your growth. Below are some factors that you can use to create that kind of environment in your life:

1) Right nutrition
Feed on the right things! Read your bible, read books, listen to teachings, partake in events that inspire you and help your grow!

2) Enough light
Tree’s need light in order to grow. How is your social environment? Is it promoting a righteous lifestyle where light reigns? Is truth wanted? Does it have good values?

3) Relationships
A tree grows stronger when it’s growing with other trees. Surround yourself with growing people! Find a mentor, have friends that you grow together with, and help others grow.

4) Positive pressure
Pressure from the ground helps the seed to become strong enough to stand the elements. Are you stretched? Is growth expected from you? Do you challenge yourself?

5) Water
Encouragement and being believed in is like living water for your heart. Do people around you believe in you? Do they speak potential and encouragement over you?

6) Vision
Have a clear picture of what you are growing towards! Have a ”model tree” that you are looking at – Jesus, the ultimate Man! What men do you admire and want to become like?

For me, my grandfather who is 93 years old is such a man in my life that I look up to, and can say ”When I am 93, I want to be a man like He is!”. John Maxwell and Andrew Wommack are two other men that I respect and admire; and of course Jesus as my King!

It might not always be possible to find a growth environment where you can check off all the points immediately. That’s OK – start where you are at!

Look at the 6 factors mentioned, and chose one or two that you want to start with. As you grow in them, you will see some change starting in your life.

From there it will become easier to add more points. You will even find how some of these other factors start opening for you!

Step out! Get started!
Who could you ask to mentor you in a specific area? What could you start doing that is outside of your comfort zone? Do you have people around you that believe in you?

For me, starting to write blogs and make videos was such a step. I had it on my heart for a while, but did not step out on it. Now I did, and am growing more because of it.

As you put these steps together with the ones mentioned in the last blog, the seed of the man that God created in you will start growing forth, becoming more and more a mighty tree and bear fruits! You grow stronger in your heart and character, you discern your purpose more and more, and God is forging out the man He created in you.

As you do that with consistency, not too long from now you will find God expanding your territory, initiating you to the next stage of your journey of manhood!

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How do you grow as a man? You become the man God created in you by going through the different stages of manhood. But how does that work? How do you grow from stage to stage?

Growth is not automatic!

A seed needs the right environment to grow, and a journey becomes a success through intentionally making one step after another. In the same way, growth as a man happens through an intentional, pro-active and focused pursuit.

So, what does that look like? How can you become proactive and focused in becoming the man God created in you?

How to get started on your growth journey
First: You have to accept and take responsibility for your own life!

At your birth, God appointed you to be the leader of your life. That means that you have the responsibility for the outcome of your life. Jesus can lead you exactly to the outcome He created you for – but you have to make Him Lord by submitting your life and free will to His Lordship, and co-lead under Him. He will never override your free will!

That means you take ownership of your life, of your actions and attitudes. It is a change in attitude and approach to your own life, where you are no longer a victim to your past or circumstances. You can change the direction of your life at any time.

I highly recommend the books ”Living Forward” by Michael Hyatt, and ”Seven habits of highly effective people” by Stephen Covey on that topic.

After you made that choice, there are several ways you can partner with God in walking the journey of manhood. Below I am going to tell you how God has lead me to apply that in my own life, and what is helping me on my journey:

1. Relationship with God
God knows you better than you know yourself, He can show you exactly where you need to grow in this season and at this time.

Personally, God showed me this year that I need to grow in the area of finances: in knowledge of how to manage personal finances, and in my attitude and beliefs about it. So, this is one of the two areas I focus my growth on.

Do a ”fruit to root examination” together with Holy Spirit: What fruits don’t you like in your life? To each fruit there is a root. Ask Holy Spirit what needs to change in your life in order for that fruit to change!
Sometimes the root to a bad fruit is found in your past, or in an ungodly belief in your heart that needs to be replaced with the truth.

2. Discern where you need to grow
Find yourself in the stages, and ask Jesus: what is required of me in that stage?
Focus your growth and faithfulness on the essentials of that stage.

Personally, I got married this summer, and am in the ”lover”-stage. So, the second area I focus my growth on is becoming a better husband and learning how to be a Jesus-like husband to my wife.

There are two main areas you can choose to grow in:

a) An area of choice: this can be your attitude, your thought life or your words. It includes also your habits, and intentional actions like generosity.

b) An area of skill: what are your strengths, talents and giftedness? Pick a skill set where you want to improve that is inline with your calling and purpose.

Write out a plan how you want to grow in each of these areas, and follow through on it.

3. Cut the chains that hold you back
There can be things in your past that you never have dealt with that are holding you back from moving forward on the manhood journey. This can be unhealed wounds, ungodly beliefs in your heart, or things that you never have forgiven. Two areas you can start looking at are:

A) Your identity as beloved son.
Look at the relationship to your father – it has big impact on how you see God as father and what you believe about yourself. You can’t be the mighty warrior or king if you aren’t the beloved son first.

B) Forgiveness.
Unforgiveness is a chain holding you back. Forgiving those who hurt you cuts it, and opens for God to restore your heart.

I highly recommend ministries like Restoring the Foundation or Sozo, which helped me greatly on the journey!

In 1.Tim. 4,12 Paul tells Timothy to become an example for others. The Greek word for ”example” is ”týpos” which literally means ”a model forged by repetition”!
It paints the picture of a smith forging a mighty sword through repeated strikes with his hammer, until it finally is a masterpiece that can serve the king in war, and is a standard for other swords.

Consistency is the key for growth! It is what will form your character as a man, forging out the man God has created in you.

Where are you at on the journey of manhood? What are your next intentional steps in becoming the man God created in you?
Write those steps out, post them in the comment section to inspire other men to take action on their growth too!

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How does it look like to become a man? How does the journey of manhood look like? If becoming a man is like a tree that is growing all it’s life from stage to stage, becoming the tree it already is, then how does that look in your life?

After finding out that becoming the man I already am is a life long journey, those were the next questions that I started asking myself.

As mentioned in the last blog, for a tree it’s all about how far it can go (grow) in becoming the tree it already is. On that life long growth journey, the tree goes through different stages. It starts as a seed, then becomes a fresh sprout, grows into a young tree, and then into a mighty tree. But how does that look like in our lives? What are the stages of manhood that I grow through on my journey of becoming the man I already am in my new born spirit?

If we look at the Hebrew language in which the Old Testament is written, we find that there are six different words used for ”man”. Each of them describes a different kind of stage in manhood.
Adam is the ”creational male”, Zakar the ”phallic male”, Gibbor a ”warrior”, Enosh describes the ”wounded male”, Ish is a ”mature man” and Zaken means a ”respected sage”.
John Eldredge describes these 6 stages very fitting as 1) the beloved son, 2) the cowboy, 3) the warrior, 4) the lover, 5) the king and 6) the sage.
I really like these descriptions, they paint a powerful picture of the stages that we as men grow through on our journey to unfold the full potential of the man God created in us.

Lets take a quick look at each stage:

1. The Beloved Son
This is a young boy who experiences his father unconditional delight and love. In this stage, the boy’s heart gets settled in that he is unconditionally loved for who he is, that his father is proud of him and greatly delights in him.

2. The Cowboy
In his teen years, the young man discovers adventure and action, and finds out that he is created for it. Because he knows that he is unconditionally loved, he is not afraid of failure. He discovers his boldness and strength, ventures out into the world to explore it.

3. The Warrior
Not afraid of adventure and being confident in his strength, the man learns to focus his strength on one cause, to fight for something. Discovering that he is meant to live for something bigger than himself, he learns resilience, how to sacrifice and how to serve. This stage is ideally lived under the guidance of an experienced King.

4. The Lover
Knowing how to fight, the man is ready for the female – where he can be entrusted with God’s daughter, to fight for and take care of her. The Man learns to lay down his life for her, and to live an unselfish, sacrificial life. He can be entrusted with the responsibility and leadership of his household. Knowing he is unconditionally loved he is able to unconditionally love his bride.

5. The King
Having shown that he can be entrusted with his bride, God can entrust him with more of Jesus bride and more influence in the Kingdom of God. He is ready to take on the responsibility and leadership over his kingdom inside the Kingdom of God, to grow and expand it. The King is also leading young warriors that serve God under him.

6. The Sage
Being experienced and having gained a lot of wisdom throughout His life, the sage is a man that kings come to for counsel and to learn from. The sage is leaving a legacy on earth through what he is imparting into kings, who again will pass that on to the warriors they are leading.

As you can see, the stages build upon each other, are intertwined and flow into each other. In each stage, God is preparing us men for the next. We also never stop functioning in the former stages. We never stop delighting in the unconditional love of God as our father.

I love 1.Cor. 13,11 which paints a powerful picture of this lifelong growth process going through the stages of growth: ”When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.” (NKJV)

Understanding these stages, and finding myself in them makes me excited for the process! It paints a vision of what God has for me, and builds passion to be faithful in this season and stage, knowing there is more ahead. God is preparing you right now to initiate you for more! What an exciting journey and lifelong adventure God has prepared for us men!
Committing to this journey of growth opens for God to maximize your impact for His Kingdom.

When is a Man a Man? When are you finally able to say ”now I am a real Man?”
Have you ever asked yourself these questions as a man? I for sure did…

For most of my own life, I was looking for the answer to that question. I wanted so bad to be a man, and I was looking to one day finally being a real man. But do you ever arrive at ”being a man”? If so, when is that point? And when not? What marks that point when you finally are a real man?

I was looking for the answer to these questions for many years, driven by the longing to be a real man. As I was on the way with Jesus, He showed me some surprising things in His word about being a real man.
Jesus showed me that becoming a man is not a point where I arrive at one day, when I finally meet a certain set of criteria. But that it is much more a journey that I will not finish in this life. He showed me how it is not about ”when do I finally arrive” – but about ”how far can I go (or grow)”!

That changed everything for me. After my new birth I am already the man God created me to be in my new born spirit, I am already a real man after God’s heart. Now, it’s all about how far can I go in becoming the man of God that He created me to be; the one I already am in my new born spirit!

Jer. 17,7-8 paints a powerful picture of a man that lives by faith in God being like a tree that is planted by rivers of water. There is so much in this about us becoming the man God created us to be:

A tree is a tree from the moment the seed sprouts forth, and it’s kind and nature is determined by the nature of the seed.
I am born again out of the seed of the word of God, the same seed like Jesus Himself was born of. That means I am by birth and nature already the kind of man God created me to be in my new born spirit. (1.Pet. 1,23)

A tree goes through different stages as it is growing, and is becoming the tree it already is.
I am now in the process of becoming that man I already am, and there are steps and stages to that process of transformation – it is a journey! (Rom. 12,1-2)

A tree never stops growing! It always is growing a bigger trunk, deeper roots and bears fruits – it’s all about ”how far, much and big can I grow” for a tree. During it’s entire life, it’s getting stronger. The same is true for me as a man: How far can I grow in becoming the Jesus-like man I am created to be?!

You can even see Jesus going through the process of growth in Lk. 2,52, where it says that He was increasing in wisdom, stature and favor with God and men.

Having that perspective has set me free from the fear of never becoming a real man. It has also taken away the limits for me as a man of God, I want to find out how far I can go in this life, how much I can grow into the man God created me to be. It is an exciting journey!
There is also no guilt, condemnation and comparison anymore about where I am as a man. It is OK where I am at currently, as long as I just keep going. In the same time, I am all the time called to go higher, there is always more for me as a man to grow into!
More character, more strength, more vision, more faith, more adventure, more mission! More growth, stronger trunk, deeper roots, more and better fruits!

God has an exciting lifetime of growth for you and me as born again son’s of God, where it is all about ”how far can I go” – not about ”when do I arrive”.

On May 5th, we finished the writing our ministry start plan! We had the opportunity to present our plan to the executive leadership of Charis Bible College, and received great and encouraging feedback!
Now we are over the start line and have started the preparation process to prepare our lunch into the ministry. Updates on our progress will come soon 🙂